Friday, February 16, 2007
{ 2/16/2007 06:35:00 PM }
I know that I shouldn't be blogging what's been happening to me but I feel I should still post it up to remind myself in the future.
Today I felt more...different than yesterday. I spoke to my teacher, Ms Fong yesterday about my problem and I'm so glad that she was willing to listen to it. I nearly cried but I hold it back. She started explaining me stuff and I felt abit better. In the evening, I went running again with Tim. I felt more relaxed but at night, I went to bed early to avoid more thinking.
Today, the feeling was more deeper. I focused and concentrate during lessons but most periods, I nearly felt like just crying and keep quiet about it but I held it back again. I didn't talk much to my classmates either and just move along. Until recess period, I talked to my classmate, Don, about it. Chinese period was after recess so we could somehow slack it. I talked to him outside class and I broke down badly. I just needed to let it out. We talked and talked till a teacher saw us and we quickly rushed back into the room. We continue talking both our problems. Anyways, it was still nice talking with him. Thanks Don.
There was the concert and I just went to sleep. I needed a rest. After the concert, I went around giving the goodies to the teachers. But Mr Royston Low saw me and suddenly asked me if I was okay. He said that I've been looking quite troubled and down the past few days (which I didn't know he noticed!) He brought me to a quiet place and I started telling him about it briefly. Yes... I broke down one more time. He talked to me and I... well... just bucked myself up. Then I gave the goodies to Ms Fong and the other English department teachers. I just chatted with her and talked to her about it.
She was worried lar.. but I just said I'm okay. She said I really don't look okay and I was like, really? She replied yeah, she could tell. (Oh crap...) She offered to give me a lift to somewhere... Yeah. I took the offer. We talked and all. Sigh. Whatever it is, I was abit better anyway.
Well... this post is actually dedicated to some people...Firstly, I want to thank Huizyi and Christabel for the concern. I appreciate it and I'll try to move on. Thanks guys (:Secondly, Timothy. Tim, thanks for the prayers. Though it didn't turn out the way we want, this has to be the way. Either way, thanks for everything (:Thirdly, Jerry, Caine and Eugene. Bros, although we're not always together and not always able to give me advice now, I appreciate everything that you tried to cheer me up and hear me out. Thanks man. I know you're always the best. Hope we can meet up together soon. Its been long since we went out together as 4. (:Forthly, Don Ho. Dude... thanks for letting me let it out this morning. Sorry if I made you abit lost of what to say or do to me but I'm glad you could listen to me out. Also, I may understand how it feels to be just like in your shoes now once. Still, thanks man. I'm grateful (:Fifthly, Debbie. Heyy, though you just messaged me this morning... thanks alot for your concern. I appreciate it. I will try to get past it.Sixthly, Mr Royston Low. Thanks alot for your words and the pat on the shoulder. We all know its hard but I know I still need to get through it. Thanks also for the concern because I didn't know you would notice it. I appreciate everything your tried to explain to me and what to think about this issue. Thank you. Lastly, Ms Fong Chee Sing. Mdm, thanks for letting me to approach you with my problem. Also, thanks for understanding me. Also, the words, the scenarios, the explaination, the pat on the shoulder, the next step to take... everything you told me. I really felt abit better after what you told me. And also, for being such a nervous-wreck whether I'll stay in one peice or not and all. Heh. I don't know how much to say thank you to you. At least, I know that I'm able to seek consultation from you if i really need one. Thank you again. ((:At the end of the day, though there are people who were really concern about me, I know that I'm still the only person to stand up alone and face it. I hope to settle down, and be strong.
All I'm clinging on is hope, faith and strength. I think a Miracle is too far from this issue.
